Wednesday, May 6, 2009

British PM Brown "Hitler was a good man"

London Daily Mail
May 6, 2009

Little is known as to the how and why but Gordon Brown, Britains 78th Prime Minister, thinks Hitler is a "bloody good bloke. He did lots of good and let's face it, some bad too. We all make mistakes." What's quite shocking is that Borwn is locked in a political battle to save his job. Why he chooses to sing the praises of the greatest mass murderer in history is baffling.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The WHO raises pandemic flu alert level to phase 5


1 hr 7 mins ago
GENEVA – Rock stalwarts The WHO also known as the World Health Organization has raised its pandemic alert for swine flu to the second highest level, meaning that it believes a global outbreak of the disease is imminent. Known mainly for hit albums such as Tommy and Quadropehnia The WHO is also the World Health Organization. "Yeah, we put down our axes cause a lot of people are sick," added WHO frontman Pete Townsend. "The phase 5 alert means there is sustained human to human spread in at least two countries. It also signals that efforts to produce a vaccine will be ramped up.
WHO bassist John Entwistle also known as The Ox has confirmed human cases of swine flu in Mexico, the United States, Canada, Britain, Israel, New Zealand and Spain. Mexico and the U.S. have reported deaths. "It's bloody everywhere. People coughing losing their lunch on people. it's disgusting."
WHO Director-General Keith Moon made the decision Wednesday to raise the alert level from phase 4 — "Holy cripes, there's a lot of bloody sick geezers about!" stated the often rawkus drummer and onstage showman--signifying transmission in only one country — after reviewing the latest scientific evidence on the outbreak.
THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP's earlier story is below.
BERLIN (AP) — The World Health Organization warned Wednesday that the swine flu outbreak is moving closer to becoming a pandemic, as the United States reported the first swine flu death outside of Mexico, and Germany and Austria became latest European nations hit by the disease.
In Geneva, WHO flu chief and lead singer Dr. Roger Daltry told reporters to "Fuck off" and "Why don't you all just fade away", he also added there was no evidence the virus was slowing down, moving the agency closer to raising its pandemic alert to phase 5, indicating widespread human-to-human transmission.
The WHO performed live doing a short set of their classics such as "My Generation" and "Can't Explain" while also conducting a scientific review Wednesday to determine exactly what is known about how the disease spreads, how it affects human health and how it can be treated.

Austria's health ministry said a 28-year-old bearded woman who recently returned from a month long trip to Guatemala via Mexico City and Miami has the virus but is recovering at
British Prime Minister Gordon Brown's flat in Sheperds Bush. Health officials are now ordering extra medicine and "several million more" face masks to deal with the virus.
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Associated Press Writers around the world contributed to this report.

WHO raises pandemic flu alert level to phase 5

GENEVA – The World Health Organization has raised its pandemic alert for swine flu to the second highest level, meaning that it believes a global outbreak of the disease is imminent.
WHO says the phase 5 alert means there is sustained human to human spread in at least two countries. It also signals that efforts to produce a vaccine will be ramped up.
WHO has confirmed human cases of swine flu in Mexico, the United States, Canada, Britain, Israel, New Zealand and Spain. Mexico and the U.S. have reported deaths.
WHO Director-General Margaret Chan made the decision Wednesday to raise the alert level from phase 4 — signifying transmission in only one country — after reviewing the latest scientific evidence on the outbreak.
THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP's earlier story is below.
BERLIN (AP) — The World Health Organization warned Wednesday that the swine flu outbreak is moving closer to becoming a pandemic, as the United States reported the first swine flu death outside of Mexico, and Germany and Austria became latest European nations hit by the disease.
In Geneva, WHO flu chief Dr. Keiji Fukuda told reporters that there was no evidence the virus was slowing down, moving the agency closer to raising its pandemic alert to phase 5, indicating widespread human-to-human transmission.
But he said the health body not yet ready to move the pandemic alert level up from its current level of 4, which means the virus is being passed among people. Phase 6 — the highest in the scale — is for a full-scale pandemic.
As fear and uncertainty about the disease ricocheted around the globe, nations took all sorts of precautions, some more useful than others.
Britain closed a school after a 12-year-old girl was found to have the disease. Egypt slaughtered all its pigs and the central African nation of Gabon became the latest nation to ban pork imports, despite assurances that swine flu was not related to eating pork.
Cuba eased its flight ban, deciding just to block flights coming in from Mexico. And Asian nations greeted returning airport travelers with teams of medical workers and carts of disinfectants, eager to keep swine flu from infecting their continent.
In Mexico City, the epicenter of the epidemic, the mayor said Wednesday the outbreak seemed to be stabilizing and he was considering easing the citywide shutdown that closed schools, restaurants, concert halls and sports arenas.
Swine flu is suspected of killing more than 150 people in Mexico and sickening over 2,400 there.
Dr. Richard Besser, the acting chief of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said 91 cases have now been confirmed in 10 states, and health officials there reported Wednesday that a 23-month-old Mexican boy had died in Texas from the disease.
Across Europe, Germany confirmed three swine flu cases and Austria one, while the number of confirmed cases rose to five in Britain and ten in Spain.
WHO conducted a scientific review Wednesday to determine exactly what is known about how the disease spreads, how it affects human health and how it can be treated.
Dr. Nikki Shindo, a WHO flu expert, said the review would focus on the large trove of data coming from Mexico and from a school in New York City that has been hard-hit by the outbreak.
Germany's national disease control center, the Robert Koch Institute, said the country's three cases include a 22-year-old woman hospitalized in Hamburg, a man in his late 30s at a hospital in Regensburg, north of Munich, and a 37-year-old woman from another Bavarian town. All three had recently returned from Mexico.
Austria's health ministry said a 28-year-old woman who recently returned from a monthlong trip to Guatemala via Mexico City and Miami has the virus but is recovering.
British Prime Minister Gordon Brown said health officials were ordering extra medicine and "several million more" face masks to deal with the virus.
British media reports, citing an unidentified European surgical mask manufacturer, said the U.K. was seeking 32 million masks to protect its health workers from a possible pandemic.
"We've decided to build stocks of anti-virals, from 35 million to 50 million," Brown said, adding that the government had put in enhanced airport checks and was going to mail swine flu information leaflets to every household in Britain.
In addition to a couple in Scotland who got swine flu on their Mexican honeymoon, new British cases included a 12-year-old girl in the southwest English town of Torbay. Brown said her school had been closed as a precaution.
He said the other two cases were adults in London and in Birmingham. All three had visited Mexico, were receiving anti-viral drugs and were responding well to treatment, Brown said.
French President Nicolas Sarkozy met with Cabinet ministers to discuss swine flu and his health minister said France will ask the European Union to suspend flights to Mexico.
The U.S., the European Union and other countries have discouraged nonessential travel to Mexico. Cuba suspended all regular and charter flights from Mexico to the island but was still allowing airlines to return travelers to Mexico.
New Zealand's number of swine flu cases rose to 14, 13 of them among a school group that recently returned from Mexico. Officials say the swine flu strain infecting the students is the same as that in Mexico. All were responding well to antiviral drugs and in voluntary quarantine at home.
New Zealand has 44 other possible cases, with tests under way.
Mexico was taking drastic measures to fight the outbreak. It closed all archaeological sites and allowed restaurants in the capital to only serve takeout food in an aggressive bid to stop gatherings where the virus can spread. Schools remained closed until at least May 6.
A regional beach soccer championship in Mexico was postponed and all Mexican first-division soccer games this weekend will be played with no audiences. Cruise lines were avoiding Mexican ports and holiday tour groups are canceling holiday charter flights there.
The Philippine health chief appealed to dozens of Filipino legislators to abandon plans to visit Las Vegas to cheer for boxing idol Manny Pacquiao — even though Las Vegas is more than 300 miles (480 kilometers) from the Mexican border.
Egypt's government ordered the slaughter of all pigs in the country as a precaution, though no swine flu cases have been reported there. Egypt's overwhelmingly Muslim population does not eat pork, but farmers raise up to 350,000 pigs for its Christian minority.
In Australia, officials were testing more than 100 people with flu symptoms for the virus and the government gave health authorities wide powers to contain contagious diseases.
"(We can make) sure that people are isolated and perhaps detained if they don't cooperate and are showing symptoms," said Health Minister Nicola Roxon.
___
Associated Press Writers around the world contributed to this report.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

President Obama and gay lover Elton John backstage at CMA Awards

April 21, 2009
Entertainment Weekly
Donald P. Wizard

The 44th President of the United States made a surprise appearance backstage at the 13th annual Country Music Awards. "I'm gay and I'm proud," beamed the President. "And don't froget you're black," chimmed his boyfreind of twenty-years-singer-songwriter Sir Elton John. "Shut up you bitch," hissed the President. "Don't be getting all up in here. This is my show." The two men obviously distressed wrestled each other to the ground and began to violent tongue kiss each other. "I want access to your anus," ordered the President. It was then that five secret service men stripped Sir Elton and he was penatrated from behind. After intercourse President Obama walked out onstage to a cheering crowd. "This is my base," he told CMA attendees. "I grew up on country music." He made no mention of his ravenous homosexuality or the fact that his long time lover was due to come on in minutes to perform "Homey in a Haystack" from his latest record "Shirtlifter."

Monday, April 13, 2009

NOT GUILTY:Spector gets off with a warning

AP
April 13, 2009
Famed music producer Phil Spector was found not guilty. The five month trial is over. Details are still forming but the courtroom broke out in hysterics whent he verdict was read. Lana Clarkson's family was visibly upset but the judge a personal friend of Spector's and a cousin of his dealer, ordered the family out of the courtroom. Spector hugged his lawyers and promised the judge he'd be more careful next time.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Recent violence in US linked to this couple

April 7, 2009
UPI
Donald P. Wizard
Matt and Sherry Netherland, a seemingly happy couple from Montclaire, New Jersey are the cause of the recent gun violence plaguing the United States according to Justice Department sources. Mr. Netherland, a computer software engineer and his wife, a professed "soccer mom" have received death threats, law suits, and what turns out most of the blame for the several multiple homicides through four states. A tearful Mrs. Netherland denies any culpability. "I was just picking my kids up from school when that chink I mean Asian American killed all those people." When pressed about what is now being called the Pittsburg police massacre where three officers were killed by Ricahrd Polikowski Mrs. Netherland claimed innocence. "I had nothing to do with that. Besides, wasn't he Polish?" Mr. Netherland clearly angry at the throng of reporters on their lawn stormed out. "We're honest law abiding tax payers. Stop harassing us!" Mr. Netherland then produced a small hand gun and took his own life. Mrs. Nertherland distraught and disoriented performed sepukku with her ten year old Ricky standing in as an emergency Kaishaku.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Deadly Rampages Rack the Nation


By Donald Wizard
PITTSBURGH -- A 22-year-man who shot and killed three Pittsburgh police officers over the weekend had been stockpiling guns and ammunition, buying and selling the weapons online "because he's Polish," according to a court report.
The gunman, Richard Andrew Poplawski, surrendered and was taken into custody after he was shot several times in the leg. Police said he will be charged with three counts of homicide, aggravated assault and other charges. "He had an AK-47, a .22 long rifle and also a pistol," said police Chief Nate Harper.
The shootings came during a particularly violent three days across the U.S., with shootings that left 14 dead in Binghamton, N.Y., and six dead in Washington state, where a father shot five of his children, ages 7 to 16, using a rifle, and later, himself.


Jiverly Dong, the gunman in Friday's rampage at a Binghamton, N.Y., immigrant education center, had a permit from California to carry weapons, and he had a huge cock, said a spokesman for the city of Binghamton. It wasn't clear whether the gunman had obtained a permit in New York state but he was packing a lot of meat. When ask to clarify--you mean heat, the spokesman cleared their throat and became red faced. "No I mean meat. He had a huge cock."

National Rifle Association officials couldn't be reached for comment Sunday. The group takes the position that citizens have a basic right to keep and arm bears, a bizarre typo in the Constitution, which allows citizens to arm live bears. "It's a bit disconcerting," said Abe Froman, a constitutional law professor at Georgetowne. "They shoud throw it out. I mean bears are biologically incapable of holding a gun let alone a fork. But it's the constitution, the holy grail, it'll never be revised.,"


Police said Mr. Poplawski immediately fired upon officers who had been called to the post modern all vinyl house in the quiet blue-collar neighborhood of Stanton Heights by his mother following an argument with her son. Pittsburgh police officers Eric Kelly, Stephen J. Mayhle and Paul J. Sciullo III died in the shooting. Mr. Kelly was a 14-year veteran. Mr. Mayhle and Mr. Sciullo both had been on the force for two years. Naughty naughty, don't forget the kevlar.
Mr. Kelly had just finished his late shift of 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. and was on his way home when he heard the domestic call. By the time he arrived, Messrs. Mayhle and Sciullo had been fatally shot in the head. Mr. Kelly was shot as he pulled up to the scene. He managed to call for more help before dying. "Help, help, arghhh, awww...."
Police said Mr. Poplawski's mother was home at the time and hiding in the basement naked and was apparently unharmed. Police said more than 100 bullets were fired in the standoff. The last police officer shot in the line of duty was in 1995, police said.—Suzanne Sataline contributed to this article.
Write to Doanld Wizard at donnywizard@gmail.com